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Showing posts from February, 2021

Gangs - this time GIRLS. An EXCITING adventure in Informal Education = Youth Work.

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Thinking about GROUP WORK  with teenage girl gangs. This group of young humans who I have worked with.  Cold contact.  Impact needed quickly.  Or they will face tough times in coming weeks. I describe:: Surface:: Behaviour issues drugs difficult strong obnoxious  attitude assaults on other girls. Underlying:: No purpose No hope At risk Scared Seek excitement No responsibilities No accountabilities Bored Beautiful humans. I need to design a session with them It is sometimes called:: Informal Education It is that + more than that ........... It is Youth-Work. Context:: a group of teenage young women  who terrorised others in the community.  Real intimidating, oppressive and aggressive.  They were a gang really.  Beautifully dressed and without boundaries........... Then ………….. A couple of women youth-workers & myself encouraged them to come out in a mini-bus.  We had to sell the adventure -  it sounded so exciting - so they came. We travelled from the inner-city  well into the countr

More of strategic work with Youth Gangs

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 I posted memories from working with gangs yesterday. SO I must follow it up with some more of strategic work with Youth Gangs For much of my life I have worked as my mission in life with Young People on the edge  or over the edge in terms of their offending behaviour. Beautiful humans. Working with gangs has been a big stretch and also a massive learning. I strive continually to understand violence and aggression to help me to be better able to be in a helping relationship with these BHP’s. A Youth Club as often been the base of operations. Where contact is first made. Where relationships commence and then …….. Branches off that base have been events outside the club life.  Such as residential experiences in the wilds of the country - or evening or day trips in the mini-bus AGAIN to build relationships as well as extend their life experiences. Group work conducted strategically has been a major part of developmental work for me and the teams I have led. I want to take you into an expe

Inner City Youth Work

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The strategy is to programme in taking a group of teens outside their comfort zones. EXPERIENTIAL  This then becomes a leveller where we all need each other.  This one - years later I get an email & a reflection regarding a visit to a remote ex farmhouse. A dry farm. The water table was no longer + No electricity  power.  No water on tap.  Outside civilisation.  No street lights.  Total blackness at night.  So years later I receive a reflection:: I asked a question to Rob:: What experience you had re Mayflower is the one you remember most? This would take a 600 page book to honestly answer, in short Profound life changing a positive life experience that would go on to effect the rest of my life, my faith my family ..... My world. I remember all of it, with Cristal clear vision, and I owe the Mayflower, you and all the staff. More than you could ever know. If you were to force me to pick a memory this would be it ............  I was feeling very down my father had just had to have

You have ......

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EMOTIONAL UNAVAILABLE PEOPLE

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  Signs of Emotional Unavailability in a Person:: 1. They avoid the “big” or “deep” stuff. Diving down into the world of emotion and feelings makes them uncomfortable. They’ll be happy to listen to their partner’s emotional “stuff” but only up to a point. When the subject matter gets too heavy they’ll change the subject. And talk of formal commitment may rattle them or even push them away. 2. They have intimacy in the same basket with something else. A person with trust issues often connects intimacy with high drama or conflict or inevitable loss/rejection — things that have happened in their past. Even when willing, they’re not free to love for love’s own sake because it means something uncomfortable for them. 3. They are naturally distrustful. When a person’s been hurt or suffered significant loss, they struggle to enter relationships — even close friendships — with an open heart. That’s because they’re scared it’ll happen again and they can’t bear that sort of pain. 4. They can’t ex

YOUR COPY TO KEEP

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Reflecting on Lockdown life at Wilson Mansions ............

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 Here I am. Lockdown like you are. Alongside that I am working daily at living with cancer. The meds - increasingly needing to be more powerful, sleep & sleepless plus fatigue which is only one of a few side effects. Otherwise life goes on. A walk a day and built in shopping (I have never been in a shop for a year other than the pharmacy  -   '1 in 1 out' shop!) The walking plan is waiting for spring and warmer weather to enable more exercise. Moreso is the chance/hope of seeing family together especially our two grandaughters (5 and 10) - last time they did a drive by - I cried ......... some feelings can't be articulated enough. 5am out of bed this morning to start the 8 a day pain killer tablets. Normal life now - to time table life around the meds schedule. I drink loads and loads of water. I don't touch alcohol at all now. I used to have a glass of red if we were out for a meal - but never done either for a pandemic year! Other aspects of life rolled on. No gig

LOVE:: Be passionate with it / learning LOVE is non-stop =Love steps outside our comfort zone

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YOUTH WORK is being on the same level - valuing the human - seeing beyond behaviour BEYOND BEYOND .......

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  Let me break this down: 1. If you have to demand respect, it’s not respect. 2. If you see our youth as Sacred, what’s there not to respect? 3. Correcting unacceptable behavior is effectively done with respect. 4. Recognizing the pain behind the behavior is only seen with eyes of love and respect. 5. If it’s not unconditional love and respect, then it’s not love and respect. 6. If love and respect are not the foundation of the work with our youth, it’s not youth work. 7. Put that ego away before you hurt someone.

Our character is disclosed .....

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One Day .................. children will ask ................

  One day.....  youngsters will learn words  they will not understand.  Children from India will ask:  What is hunger?  Children from Alabama will ask:  What is racial segregation?  Children from Hiroshima will ask:  What is the atomic bomb?  Children in schools will ask: •  What is war?  You will answer them.  You will tell them  Those words are not used anymore,  Like crucifixions, galleys or slavery  Words no longer meaningful.  That is why they have been removed from dictionaries.  Martin Luther King, preacher, civil rights activist

With training and a will to love we can train our brain to take over when under pressure/threat.

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  I WAS ONCE  on a Bus in central London. There was a vicious racially motivated attack. It was an attack. Language and blows. Aggression and violence. It disturbed all on the crowded bus. Fear more than disturbed. I have seen so much of it in my life. I have seen a young mans head being kicked around like a ball. I have experienced knives, pick axes, meat cleavers all in the hands of humans out of control. As today. I once was passing a Youth Club corridor with two young men fighting with knives. I walked on because what I had to deal with  was much worse. I hate violence. I lead training sessions for workers about managing aggression and violence but I hate it hate it. It is a result of surges of emotion taking over the human. Fear, insecurity, anger alongside lack of emotional intelligence. We do it too,when we snap back at the persons we love. It comes out of the same place. It is built up in tribes, gangs, crowds and Nations too. Lord have mercy. We have much to do. We have so muc

BLOB JIGSAW

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  Blob Jigsaw blobshop £3.00 GBP   Qty.   Add to Cart Qty available:   0 Blob Jigsaw * the purchased image comes without watermark and in full resolution * remember to add your  free Blob Tools Guide  to your shopping cart activities   blob tree   broken   celebration damage   feelings   fulfillment   groups growing   growth   hidden   journey   learning outdoors   scars   teaching   theoretical       Save

WORKING WITH GROUPS - building a climate of trust.

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When it comes to talking about feelings, touching on any sense of  emotional interior activity - often the shutters come down. Most will walk up to a Blob Tree, on a big screen, and place a sticker where they are/ describing how they are feeling non-verbally -  but, then they often won't talk about their feelings - but this is still a step forward. Emotional literacy is about being able to express feelings with words. Not just 'happy' or 'sad'. Every feeling comes under those headings. The Blob Teenage cards  get them talking. Talking about how the Blobs are feeling. It is a forward step to be able to say how a Blob is feeling. The Blob Jigsaw gets them active but struggle to respond to questions. The best methods I have discovered is to show slices out of a movie. This engages them, moves them, stirs their feelings and then they spill. All depending how free/insecure they are. All depending how chained they are by their own peers. + depending on the climate of tru

Then they came for me .....

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We had been married for one year and THEN this !!!!!!!!!

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  Joan was 21, I was 26 when we sold up, burned bridges, and moved to live & work in a Young Offenders Unit as Houseparents. It was a school by name but - really an education prison for young boys 14 to 17.  All from Manchester. We had been married for one year and then this !!!!!!!!! (I am on my laptop. I am expecting a knock on the door by Joy.  She was born in this unit place. Joy our first child born with 15 ready made teenage 'brothers'.) * It was the start of our journey - break away from home town to follow the  call risk risk failure learn inability turning to competence - well .... ..... not so much the competence. Before this job, I was working at Pilkington Glass in their Research Laboratory. They used to call me 'the Rocking Vicar' because I was always singing as I worked. I want to write about our above work. Yet it so sensitive.  I have lots of letters from these boys/men by now methinks letters I would love to share - some  powerful stories too. I wan